What do stay at home moms do all day?

This is an article I found about motherhood from the Washington Post. HILARIOUS....Mostly because I used to ponder this very question before I had Jack. Sure puts things into perspective! Ha!

***Jami, this article is dedicated to the woman on the plane that told you to try something different to keep Bayles quiet :)


TELL ME ABOUT IT ®

By Carolyn Hax
Wednesday, May 23, 2007; C10

Carolyn:

Best friend has child. Her: exhausted, busy, no time for self, no time for me, etc. Me (no kids): Wow. Sorry. What'd you do today? Her: Park, play group . . .

Okay. I've done Internet searches, I've talked to parents. I don't get it. What do stay-at-home moms do all day? Please no lists of library, grocery store, dry cleaners . . . I do all those things, too, and I don't do them EVERY DAY. I guess what I'm asking is: What is a typical day and why don't moms have time for a call or e-mail? I work and am away from home nine hours a day (plus a few late work events) and I manage to get it all done. I'm feeling like the kid is an excuse to relax and enjoy -- not a bad thing at all -- but if so, why won't my friend tell me the truth? Is this a peeing contest ("My life is so much harder than yours")? What's the deal? I've got friends with and without kids and all us child-free folks get the same story and have the same questions.

Tacoma, Wash.

Relax and enjoy. You're funny.

Or you're lying about having friends with kids.

Or you're taking them at their word that they actually have kids, because you haven't personally been in the same room with them.

Internet searches?

I keep wavering between giving you a straight answer and giving my forehead some keyboard. To claim you want to understand, while in the same breath implying that the only logical conclusions are that your mom-friends are either lying or competing with you, is disingenuous indeed.

So, since it's validation you seem to want, the real answer is what you get. In list form. When you have young kids, your typical day is: constant attention, from getting them out of bed, fed, clean, dressed; to keeping them out of harm's way; to answering their coos, cries, questions; to having two arms and carrying one kid, one set of car keys, and supplies for even the quickest trips, including the latest-to-be-declared-essential piece of molded plastic gear; to keeping them from unshelving books at the library; to enforcing rest times; to staying one step ahead of them lest they get too hungry, tired or bored, any one of which produces the kind of checkout-line screaming that gets the checkout line shaking its head.

It's needing 45 minutes to do what takes others 15.

It's constant vigilance, constant touch, constant use of your voice, constant relegation of your needs to the second tier.

It's constant scrutiny and second-guessing from family and friends, well-meaning and otherwise. It's resisting constant temptation to seek short-term relief at everyone's long-term expense.

It's doing all this while concurrently teaching virtually everything -- language, manners, safety, resourcefulness, discipline, curiosity, creativity. Empathy. Everything.

It's also a choice, yes. And a joy. But if you spent all day, every day, with this brand of joy, and then, when you got your first 10 minutes to yourself, wanted to be alone with your thoughts instead of calling a good friend, a good friend wouldn't judge you, complain about you to mutual friends, or marvel how much more productively she uses her time. Either make a sincere effort to understand or keep your snit to yourself.

Write to Tell Me About It, Style, 1150 15th St. NW, Washington, D.C. 20071, ortellme@washpost.com.

I hope Mammy isn't right

I love Gone With the Wind. I think I was Scarlett O'Hara every Halloween from kindergarten to 6th grade. One of my favorite scenes is after Scarlett has her baby. Scarlett makes Mammy measure around her waist after her corset is tightened again.

Scarlett: Try again, Mammy.
Mammy: Twenty inches.
Scarlett: Twenty inches? I've grown as big as aunt Pitty. You've simply got to make it eighteen and a half again, Mammy.
Mammy: You've done had a baby, Miss Scarlett. And you ain't never going to be no eighteen and a half inches again. Never. And there ain't nothing to do about it.

Well, I fully intend to prove Mammy wrong. Even if it takes me the next 6 years :)

G-DUB

The decision is in. We are going to be East Coasters! Jay has picked George Washington University for his masters program in International Security. We are really excited for a new adventure, but we get to enjoy Colorado for a few more months before we take off! It will be a major change from living in the country to living in a huge, busy city... should be a really fun 2 years!

Like Father, Like Son

Evidently being accident prone is genetic. Jay separated his shoulder 4 days before we got married and has had little injuries here and there ever since. Jack is certainly following in his footsteps :) He has been crying a little for the past week when we pick him up. Jay and I tried to test his arms out to pin point where it was hurting him. Well, we couldn't ever find anything so we figured he was ok. Yesterday at church he started screaming like he was in excruciating pain. When we got home, we took off his shirt and sure enough, his shoulder and collarbone were swollen and a little bruised. We took him into the Dr. this morning and found out he has a fractured collarbone. We have no idea how or when he did it. He has been crawling like normal and pulling himself up and reaching for things. We had no idea! So, he gets to wear this sweet little brace to keep his shoulders from moving. He looks like a bulldog when he crawls and when he sits up he kind of looks like Frankenstein, but he doesn't seem to mind it and goes about his business as usual. Yay for x-rays and doctors!!! On the upside, at least for Halloween I can turn the brace into a little gun holster and he can be Jack Bauer :)

Snow Day!!

Colorado snow is the best because it goes away quickly :) It snowed a foot on Thursday and is already gone today. We had fun staying cooped up all day. Jack loved to stare out the window at the snow and I had fun plowing it.

It's Egg Stand-Up Day!!!

Happy first day of Spring! The only day an egg stands up by itself......one of the many Johnson traditions and made-up reasons to celebrate :)

A Very Merry Unbirthday

Yay for birthdays!! Last week poor Jay turned 27. So old! :) Today, is my half birthday! I don't have to be 27 for 6 more months!! So, we went on a St. Patrick's/Unbirthday picnic in the mountains. It was absolutely gorgeous! It was Jack's first picnic and I think he really liked it. We couldn't get him to look at the camera though. The river was a little more exciting.







I made my first cheesecake ever for Jay's birthday. It was soooooo yummy!


My friend Meghan sent Jack a DU beanie and t-shirt. I think it is mostly to bribe us to go there:) (Jay also got into the U of Maryland this week. Congratulations to him!)



Here are some funny videos of Jack. His first time on the swings (which he LOVED) and his amazing rocking chair abilities.